Why being salesy doesn't work in B2B Sales

Since starting at Hayward Miller, script writing has been the most difficult part of the job.

For the first versions of my email copy, I was told I was “too salesy”.

I was dumbfounded, this was a B2B sales agency, right?

My only knowledge of sales emails up to that point had been what I’d received in my inbox. Emails telling me that they were ‘the leading provider of X’ and that that they could ‘level-up my marketing’. Of course, those phrases ended up in my own copy.

I’m now on the other side of the email, and I can understand why my manager wanted to rip his hair out.

Everyone is sick to death of ‘we can boost your sales’ and ‘drive real results’ - these phrases scream mass marketing techniques, often seasoned with a heavy dose of AI.

The real challenge has been unlearning this forced way of communicating and replacing it with genuine curiosity and real bids for connection.

What I've Learnt

I’ve found that being super-specific in targeting allows for personalised email outreach that sounds as if I am talking directly to one person, rather than to a whole database.

I’ve even gone as far as creating fake names and businesses within the scripts. It’s far too easy to type {{FIRST_NAME}} and forget there’s actually another person at the other end of the email. While it might feel a bit weird writing to Joan at Just Jargon Ltd, I’ve definitely seen an improvement in the tone and flow of my scripts (aka my manager makes slightly fewer corrections).

The other aspect of less “salesy” emails is simply being authentic. My aim is to have a chat with someone and see if our services can genuinely help them. On the flip side, I also want to find out if we can’t help them, saving us all time in the long run.

I might as well have a t-shirt labelled with ‘I’m just trying to have a conversation!’.

This style seems to be working – higher open rates and some promising replies tell me my scripts are heading in the right direction. Maybe it goes to show that not selling can be the most useful sales technique there is.